Thursday 16 June 2011

Life in Balance.

Many of you have been asking where I am these days...But I do have a question.: "Is there any way to have meaning in your life when you’re disconnected from everyone? I don’t think so…
Anyway, I hate when people discourage me about my choices, I hate most when I do the same thing with the one I love regarding the future by giving too much attention to what the others are saying.
I hate my vulnerability, I hate when I cannot keep thoughts just to myself and deal with them alone, I hate when I start to worry wondering that I am not good enough for anything or anybody…
I hate when I cannot find a place to fit in, I hate when I don’t know what is worse – my silence or my empty words…
I hate to distrust my feelings, I hate to put him in doubt!
I am really tired – tired of trying, tired of not doing anything. I feel like everyone around me can screw up and that’s OK, but if I screw up.
I have taken a break from web for while. I am still around of course, watching others on cam and chatting and working a lot. Days are passing by, faster than before and after all those weeks living together I know exactly what I want, but more than ever everyone is telling me that it’s just a fairy tale…
Miles away, tears, time difference, days, more tears…Shit, it’s not fair!!!




I had nightmares which is rare for someone like me that barely sleeps… I dreamt I was looking at the world from the other side of the window and all that I saw was people coming and going, the clouds moving across the sky too fast, ocean waves breaking on the beach, the birds flying in circles up high… I was alone.
I wish I could be a bird, I wish I could fly away, I wish the sky was the limit.
I wish I had someone I could be really close to, without fear of getting hurt day after day And that’s the reason why I have been considering strongly the possibility of committing “social suicide”. I am weird, with plenty of troubles, my days showing me that I’ve been doing the wrong thing...often I enjoy the fact that I can easily avoid or ignore people just because I don’t want to give them the answers which I don’t have…
Please, Dear Friends, don’t blame me, it will be better for everybody as I suppose no one loves to hear others complaints and at the moment I have nothing else to offer but this…
However in some ways I feel sorry for not making the best of my life but yet I accept me as I am."
Anyway, I've been so many places in my life and time I will post some photos here.
In the meantime, there have been so many new cuties on cam that I thought I would point out one of my favs.: Frederick Schimitz´s.

Wednesday 15 December 2010

Marilyn Monroe - After you get what you want

Symphony - Aquatic Male Beauty

Live life fully...


‎"Live life fully while you're here. Experience everything. Take care of yourself and your friends. Have fun, be crazy, be weird. Go out and screw up! You're going to anyway, so you might as well enjoy the process. Take the opportunity to learn from your mistakes: find the cause of your problem and eliminate it. Don't try to be perfect; just be an excellent example of being human.” - Anthony Robbins